auriali — 3/7/2026, 11:35:17 PM

more headlines because its like the only thing i feel i can do to keep myself sane lol:

  1. Netanyahu Says War With Iran Will Not Be Endless As Sun Will Explode In 5 Billion Years

  2. Netanyahu Gave Trump McDonald's Gift Card In Exchange For War With Iran, Says Insider

  3. Nation Allowed To Talk About Epstein Again After DOW Drops Below 50,000 Due To Iran War

  4. Iran Claims Airstrikes Are ‘Woke’ In Hopes Of Deterring Further U.S. Strikes

  5. ‘We Are Not Fighting Israel's War’ Says Trump With Gun Pointed At Him By Netanyahu

  6. Talk Page For Wikipedia Article On Iran War More Thorough Than Israel-U.S. War Plans

  7. Wikipedia Article For Iran War Changing Faster Than You Change Underwear

  8. ‘Peace Through Strength’ Just Marketing Gimmick

  9. Pentagon Typo Accidentally Refers To ‘Operation Epic Fury’ As ‘Operation Epic Furry’

  10. ChatGPT Reassures Trump That ‘Operation Epic Fury’ Is Cool Name For Operation

  11. ‘Hold My Hand’ By Jess Glynne Plays As First UK Government Flight Evacuating Britons Departs Middle East

  12. Trump Mourns His Polling Numbers

  13. Pete Hegseth Drunkenly Sends Planned Airstrikes To Iran On Signal

  14. ‘Fuck It We Ball’ Says Congress As It Sends Entire U.S. Budget To Israel

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toaks:

I really like 1, 9, and 14

3/7/2026, 11:48:12 PM