By The Wasted Onion: ‘You Guys Are On Your Fucking Own’ Comments President Kiwi As He Announces Long Vacation

THE INTERNET—Replying to a comment on a post from one of his own citizens Thursday, wasteof.money President Kiwi has told the nation they are "on their fucking own" while also announcing his intentions to take a lengthy vacation. "nah, you guys are on your fucking own, i'm taking a vacation," said the president's comment made under a post by wasteof owner Jeffalo, which was also a reply to a user simply stating the president had one fucking job. "The president is extremely hard working and deserves to take a break every now and again. Plus, they did see a Jet2holidays advert with that Jess Glynne song that became a meme, and we all know that you cannot resist the offer of having a vacation with Jet2holidays," said Secretary of State and Propaganda @EngineerRunner. Later as the nation descended into chaos, the Crack House clarified that the president was vacationing at third-party Scratch project hosting service Hatch. At press time, the government was scrambling to find Vice President Late to help bring calm to the situation, only to realise the vice president was just being on brand by being late to intervene.

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