Daily Election Update: As the campaign heats up, candidates have begun throwing attacks at one another akin to that of siblings fighting over who gets to play on the Xbox.
Updates from the campaign trail:
On wasteof, Oren said that he thinks in “realistic terms, trying to do what I actually can for YOU. Like hanging up our nation's new flag in my basement that I made with crayons.”
Kiwi was seen taking his campaign across the world to scream “thank you” to everyone that voted for him regardless of if they died from a heart attack or not.
KyleTech rushed the stage of The-Owlsss’s rally to announce he is dropping out of the race, forgetting that he never entered in the first place
TallPeter better watch his fucking back after he made a satire news graphic depicting Kiwi falling down the stairs. There’s only room for one of us, and it's us.
Elsie was in a campaign fundraising event today doing the Harlem Shake to Pink Pony Club by Chappel Roan for 3 hours.
V1 has claimed their campaign was being silenced, yet here they are in The Only News Source, you’re welcome.
Pufferfish101007 has said they will now add the words “poggers” and “rizz” to their Most Excellently Ordained Words (MEOWs) list.
SixFourLu has said they will appoint Elon Musk in the cabinet position of “fake position in the government like Elon Musk.”
Posting on wasteof, WannaBeRose said “holy shit i may have found the new stupidest thing ever” while reposting an image of this post.
this might be the first time i’ve seen the phrase “poggers” on the internet in three years