what do you expect when you see a sivyx essay? personally, i don’t have a criteria or ideas behind any of them, and I just start writing whenever i’m bored. usually it ends up being a commentary about something, subtle or not, but each time the reception is different. you see, writing an essay isn’t about wit as much as it is about time. all you need is the time to write it, and though general wits may be helpful (for example, it takes me about 5 minutes to write something like the Falling Off essay) they really aren’t that important.

let’s take something in as an example. when writing an essay for school, it’s important to put the time into it and to make sure that what you’re writing fits the topic, and that your sources (if required) are relevant and trustworthy. but when writing an essay for a social media website, none of that is as prevalent. all you need for a successful essay in the form of this one is a vast vocabulary and some ability to hide your commentary on something in particular.

for example, my Falling Off essay was written on a whim, in about 5 minutes. perhaps it may take you longer to write something of that factor, but that’s not important. the essay didn’t tell you what it was about right away, no, it waited. it waited until the very end for me to express my thoughts in a meaningful and impactful way, while still throwing in comedy where it could be done. that’s really all you need to be able to do.

you also need a good amount of judgement. sometimes your essay wont be quite up to par, and at that point you can either make the hard decision to throw it away, or you can fix it. fixing it is usually my choice, for example, with my essay for @ee. the comedic parts that I implemented after the first paragraph were not my first idea, however after realizing i’d gone too formal after the first few sentences, i ran with it and continued.

no, you don’t need wits, you just need creativity. if you dont have that, then use this: http://watchout4snakes.com/Random/RandomParagraph

no, it wont make sense, but it will be funny. and sometimes that’s all you need.